It's All About the Timing

As scared to death as I am of getting the shot and suffering possible side effects and paying freakin' $750 for A SHOT, I'm also a bit thankful for the timing of it. Wanna know what's kept me distracted? (I know you're on the edge of your seat/couch/bed/etc) HAHA! :)

1. The house hunting, paperwork dealing, and pre-decorating have majorly distracted me!
2. I'm gonna get stuck with the lovely needle during my Spring Break (yes, this is bittersweet)
3. I'm spending the 4 days BEFORE the shot in NYC, baby! yeah! I'm so pumped. I've never been in the Spring! Only fall and winter. Looking forward to central park! (and LOTS of other stuff!)
4. I hosted my fun book club meeting this month. Which meant I had a book to read and a mini party to plan! We read They Did it with Love. Very good, light mystery! Had me up until the very end!
5. My SIL is having a boy. We found out a couple of weeks ago. This just pumped me up more for getting brave and strong about the shot and trying to think positive! My SIL's pregnancy is moving right along and now that we know the sex and the name, it's giving me major baby fever (as if it's not already there!)
6. It's soon. It's almost here. I haven't had to wait too long and over analyze things and stress. It's been on the backburner (thanks to all my distractions!)
7. And finally...it's ONE STEP CLOSER TO A BABY!

Scheduling a consult w/ an IF specialist

Well, after some good days and major freak out days, I am still not at peace with the Lupron decision.  I have put a hold on filling the prescription and Zach and I have decided to seek out the opinion of an Infertility Specialist.  My doctor referred one to us and it happens to be the same one that wonderful friends (and new parents) of ours used to!  I am filling out paperwork tonight and we're hoping to get an appt quick.   I have called my insurance company to verify IF coverage. I don't have any IF coverage.  sadness...

I've noticed on some of your blogs that the IVF meds are like $4000 but then you still have to pay the doctor and the actual procedures and stuff too...

Can anyone tell me about how much to expect to pay out of pocket?  

Long Story Short

We have 2 options:   IVF or Lupron

We have decided to try the Lupron since my insurance will cover part
of it (I think).  If insurance does not cover it, it will cost us $500
a month.  for 6 months. So it's $3000 to try this or $25,000 (or more-- I do not have IF coverage) to go straight to IVF.

She has to start me on the Lupron within 2 days of me getting my
period.  She says she might be able to have it in by friday.  I am
'supposed' to start my period Wednesday.  Timeline is not looking
good.  I think I am already cramping and spotting. Looks like this
month is going to be a bust.  And I really wanted to do it this month
so it could be in my system for a month before school starts back.
She says the first 2 weeks are the worst b/c your body is shutting
down...  *sigh...

In the meantime we will meet with an RE and see about our other  options.  Just in case I can't handle the side effects.

IVF question

Can anyone tell me the role Lupron plays in IVF?  I've been reading lots of your blogs and have noticed it in your schedules and stuff.

Yes, I'm still stuck on this Lupron stuff!  I have to make a decision about it soon!  (read previous post...)

I'm scared

I've been on quite an emotional roller coaster this past week. I think it finally hit me the other night what is happening to me. I had been doing some research on endometriosis and the Lupron drug my doctor is suggesting. And I'm scared. And sad. I haven't been able to sleep at night (hence this post at 2:30 am!). I got up at 3:00 am the other night and just went in the bathroom and cried my eyes out for about half an hour. I guess I just feel like I've taken one step forward and about 3 back. I thought that clearing the tubes through my surgery would be the end of my trouble. Only then to find out that my trouble has truly just begun. The Lupron sound mega-scary. I've been reading people's comments about it in forums and stuff and it sounds plain bad. The major weight gain (like 10 pounds per month), depression, mood swings, joint pain, hair loss and more. Women say that they look in the mirror and don't recognize themselves. That they are 30 years old but feel 80. Anyway, I'm trying to stay positive and not freak out. I am working on a big list of questions for my doctor when we meet with her next Monday.

Surgery Update

So, my surgery (laparascopy) was this past Monday, the 15th.

It was uncomfortable to say the least and the outcome was not at all what I expected. The good news is that she was able to unblock my tubes! yay!
The bad news is, I had TONS and TONS of endometriosis. It was covering everything-- my bladder, uterus, tubes, and my ovaries. My left ovary was so swollen and enlarged that it was bigger than my uterus! It was also so badly covered in endometriosis that she said if I had already had my children, she would have removed it.

So, I have been on bed rest this week. I have had terrible gas pains (trapped gas left over from the surgery) and my midsection is really sore. Feelin' a little more alive today. got majorly dehydrated wednesday afternoon and yesterday was rough trying to catch up on my fluids. i felt like i had the WORST hangover EVER! I'm still only eating toast. yum. But i have managed to take a shower and put on 'real' clothes today! yay! and I'm outta the bed and downstairs on the couch watching the Today show and reading blogs! 

Progress, ladies, progress! I am supposed to be 'normal' by this weekend. I sure hope so! 

I go back to the doctor next Monday (29th) to start my next round of treatment--Lupron (I think--I was pretty out of it when she told me the name). In any case I know it is a drug that will put me into menopause. That's right ladies, menopause. For 6 months. The lupron will decrease the amount of estrogen my body makes which the endometriosis feeds off of. So I will be a lovely, hot MESS for the next 6 months! 

After all of that I should be clear to start trying for a baby. I will know more after my meeting next Monday. I'm nervous, to say the least. I have, of course, googled Lupron.  The side effects of the do NOT sound good. But I have to get rid of the endometriosis. My doctor could not believe how much was in there and that I was not doubled over in pain every single month popping loratab. Anyway, that's all for now...